1949: Tom Waits
75 great Tom Waits moments for the great mans 75 birthday
75 years ago today Tom Waits was born in the back seat of a taxi cab (and in need of a shave, or so he says). In those 75 years, he has been plenty of things to plenty of people.
He’s been a poet, he’s been an illusionist and he’s been a gravedigger. He’s been a ventriloquist and a carnival barker. He’s been a tight-rope walker and a trapeze artist and a singer and a dancer and a painter and an actor, too. He’s been a nightwatchman and a daydreamer. He’s been a realist and a surrealist and a magician. He’s been a scholar and he’s been a teacher. He’s been a bluesman and a folksinger and a rapper and a rocker and a howler and a crooner and a jazzbo. He’s been the devil and he’s been a priest. He’s been a stand up comedian and a sit down pianist, he’s been a guitarist and a Conundrumist, too. He’s been a horror and he’s been heartbreaking and he’s been poignant and he’s been playful. He’s an inventor and he’s an innovator. He is a true original, and, to put it much more simply, he is a genius.
He’s been Straight to the Top and he’s been down on the Bottom of the World. He’s been everywhere above and below that, as well, and everywhere in between, too.
To celebrate his birthday today, here are 75 timeless, and great, Tom Waits moments - in no particular order at all - to mark 75 great years of the timeless Tom Waits.
1 - His great debut album, Closing Time, which features all time classics like Ol’ 55, I Hope That I Don’t Fall in Love With You, Martha, Rosie and Grapefruit Moon, among others, and which sounds absolutely nothing like his later work in all the best ways.
2 - His iconic 1979 appearance on Australian TV being interviewed by Don Lane. Waits proved his comic timing was just as faultless as his musical timing throughout. His mannerisms and vocal patterns in the interview are reported to have inspired Heath Ledger’s portrayal of the Joker in Christopher Nolan’s The Dark Knight.
3 - His appearance as The Devil, alongside Heath Ledger, in Terry Gilliam’s 2009 phantasmagorical film The Imaginarium of Doctor Parnassus. No one has ever been more suited to the role.
4 - His acting debut as Mumbles, the singing barfly, alongside Sylvester Stallone in 1978’s Paradise Alley. No one has ever been more suited to a role.
5 - The whole of the Rain Dogs album, from Singapore to Bride Of Rain Dog (Instrumental), but especially Clap Hands, Cemetery Polka, Tango Til They’re Sore, Downtown Train, Jockey Full of Bourbon and Rain Dogs and all the rest.
6 - This quasi-religious live 1999 performance of Come on Up to the House:
7 - The lyric “come down off the cross, we can use the wood".
8 - The entirety of the Blue Valentine album. Opening with it’s audacious musical theatre cover and working it’s way through America’s underbelly, this was the defining album of the first part of Waits’ career.
9 - The quip “I’d rather have a bottle in front of me than a frontal lobotomy”, and everything else he says and sings on the Fernwood Tonight TV show in 1977.
10 - Waits’ 1985 appearance on Live On The Tube in 1985, on which he played Shells from a 30.06, Cemetary Polka, In the Neighbourhood (with a blast of Auld Lang Syne for good measure) and Walking Spanish.
11 - The sardonic, sadistic dry wit of Franks Wild Years; the pronunciation of the phrase “chim-en-ey red”, and the throwaway delivery of the final punch-line, “never could stand that dog”.
12 - His Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction speech in 2011 which was as bursting with as many lines of genius as his lyrics are, including “you know, songs are just very interesting things to be doing with the air”, “every day on this side of the dirt is a good day”, “I’d like to thank my family, they know me and they love me anyway”, and his later quip on The Tonight Show Starring Jimmy Fallon when he asked “how long do we have to wait out here in the Hall? There’s gotta be a Room somewhere”.
13 - Releasing two incredible albums on the same day in 2002, in Blood Money and Alice.
14 - His hilarious appearance on The Late Show With David Letterman in support of the two albums (“I think you should get both, myself”) which builds up to his his story about how “everybody knows me, at the dump”.
15 - His even more hilarious appearance on The Late Show With David Letterman when promoting the 2004 follow up album Real Gone, in which he talks about horse self-portraiture and cribbing.
16 - Yet another Letterman interview, this time in 2009, to talk about his most recent album Bad As Me but which really shows off his talents as a prop comedian thanks to his demonstration of an 1800’s rat-catching device.
17 - Reinventing himself so bravely, creatively and drastically with Swordfishtrombones and never looking back.
18 - The story told on Swordfishtrombones track Shore Leave, and especially the lyric “and I wondered how the same moon outside over this Chinatown fair could look down on Illinois, and find you there”.
19 - All of the wordplay in Step Right Up, but especially the lyric “the large print giveth, and the small print taketh away” and the delivery on the lines “It finds you a job. It IS a job”, and "Christ, you don't know the meaning of heartbreak, buddy".
20 - The whole of 1999’s excellent Mule Variations album, but especially the songs Hold On, Get Behind the Mule, House Where Nobody Lives, Cold Water, What’s He Building?, Picture in a Frame and Come On Up to the House.
21 - Playing the rabbit-loving Zachariah Rigby, one of seven psychopaths in Martin McDonagh’s triumphantly funny 2012 film, Seven Psychopaths, alongside Colin Farrell, Woody Harrelson, Sam Rockwell and Christopher Walken.
22 - His morbid but moving 1978 blending of Silent Night with his own Christmas Card From a Hooker in Minneapolis at a taping of the Austin City Limits show.
23 - When he took Frito-Lay and advertising agency Tracy-Locke Inc. to court in 1988, and won, for voice misappropriation and false endorsement after they made a Doritos advert featuring Tom Waits-style song supporting the product. One of the producers behind the advert had previously tried to get Waits to do a voice-over for a Coca-Cola commercial but said of the singer that “you’d never heard anybody say ‘no’ so fast in your life”.
24 - Turning down Frito-Lay and Coca-Cola but accepting a gig as a voiceover for a Purina dog food ad in 1981.
25 - When he sued the police department in Los Angeles for wrongful arrest and won a $7,500 payout.
26 - The way his voice flicks up at the end of the line on his delivery of “now, some say he's doing the obituary mambo” on Swordfishtrombones’ Swordfishtrombone.
27 - His biggest “hit”, Downtown Train, which proves he could write pop songs with the best of them, if he’d have wanted to.
28 - The visceral, aggressive and sensual instrumental piece Tango at the 1981 Montreal Jazz Festival where Waits alternately plays piano with his fingers, fists and feet.
29 - This performance of Tom Trauberts Blues from a 1977 appearance on German TV show Rockpalast, when Waits was halfway between his transformation from the down-on-his-luck night-jazz barfly of old to the carnival barking nightmare merchant we know now
30 - When he interviewed himself in 2008 and, among other highlights, came up with the evocative, depressing and hard-hitting response to his question about what is wrong in the world, “we are buried beneath the weight of information, which is being confused with knowledge; quantity is being confused with abundance and wealth with happiness. We are monkeys with money and guns”.
31 - When he said in an interview with NPR’s Terry Gross that “I guess I like beautiful melodies telling me terrible things”.
32 - The equal parts horrific and hilarious delivery on What's He Building?
33 - The hilarious Private Listening Party promo video for the Bad As Me album.
34 - His tender piano duet with Crystal Gayle on Take Me Home, an outtake from the One From the Heart soundtrack, and his smooth and smoky collaboration with Bette Midler on I Never Talk to Strangers from Foreign Affairs.
35 - All of the brawlers, bawlers and bastards on Orphans, but especially Lie to Me, Bottom of the World, Bend Down the Branches, You Can Never Hold Back Spring, Little Drop of Poison and the stunning World Keeps Turning.
36 - His role as Waller the ageing bank-robber in Robert Redford’s charming 2018 lead-role swansong, The Old Man & The Gun.
37 - Waits’ 2007 performance with the Kronos Quartet at the Shoreline Amphitheatre in California for Neil Young’s 21st Bridge School Benefit concert, and especially this rendition of God’s Away on Business which would have surely put a nightmare into any of the schoolchildren present
38 - Saying “which one is it?” when the band started playing the intro to the same song, a year later on tour in Edinburgh, before adding “Christ! It could be…seven hundred of them! And they’re all good!” Before kicking into another killer God’s Away on Business.
39 - Waits’ narration of the 2018 stop-motion short film The Moon’s Milk.
40 - The earth-shattering, swaggering and hypnotising power of Hoist That Rag from 2004’s Real Gone record.
41 - The delivery on every line in Bad as Me, but especially in the cracked and devilish line “No good you say? Well that's good enough for me”.
42 - The hilarious 2008 Glitter and Doom Tour announcement faux press-conference. PEHDTSCKJMBA.
43 - “This is a song my dad taught me when I was a kid. That’s a lie. This is a song I learned from some kids in the alley behind the theatre. That’s a lie, too. I learned this from Gregory Peck. That too is a lie. They’re all lies. The whole song is a lie. No it’s not.”
44 - The way he says “Pava-rot-ti”.
45 - All of his wildly creative, visually engaging and arresting photoshoots, but especially those with Anton Corbijn.
46 - The howling, yearning, crying and roaring vocal on Anywhere I Lay My Head.
47 - The poignancy in the lyrics to Whistle Down The Wind.
48 - When he invented his own musical instrument, called The Conundrum, which he played on 1992’s Bone Machine. Waits has described the instrument as “just a metal configuration, like a metal cross. It looks a little bit like a Chinese torture device. It’s a simple thing, but it gives you access to these alternative sound sources. Hit them with a hammer; sounds like a jail door closing behind you. I like it”.
49 - The urgency in his nonsense made-up language on Komminiezuspät, from Alice. “And we can’t be late!”
50 - His 1999 appearance on VH1’s Storytellers show, in which he shows off his skills as a true storyteller in both his lyrics and the in-between song patter.
51 - Out-weirding Iggy Pop in Jim Jarmusch’s wonderful 2003 movie collage Cigarettes & Coffee. “You know, the beauty of quitting, is that now that I’ve quit, I can have one. Because I’ve quit.”
52 - The heartbreaking On the Nickel from 1980’s Heartattack and Vine.
53 - When a white-haired Tom Waits joined Mavis Staples on stage for a surprise duet of Respect Yourself at the Lagunitas Brewing company in Petaluma, California on 13th September 2017.
54 - The lyric “I'll tell you all my secrets, but I lie about my past”.
55 - Joining The Rolling Stones on stage at Oakland, CA’s Oracle Arena on 05.05.2013 and showing Mick Jagger how a real bluesman sings Little Red Rooster.
56 - His contribution to the stunning 1993 Mercury Prize nominated Jesus Blood Never Failed Me Yet project from Gavin Bryars.
57 - His pitch-perfect portrayal of R.M. Renfield in Francis Ford Coppola’s mind-blowing 1992 movie adaptation of Bram Stoker's Dracula.
58 - All his cover songs and versions, but especially Somewhere (From “West Side Story”), I Got You (I Feel Good), Sea of Love, Young at Heart, Goodnight Irene, Heigh Ho (The Dwarfs Marching Song), Shenandoah, Bella Ciao and John the Revelator.
59 - The lyric, and delivery of the line “don’t trust a bulls horn, a doberman’s tooth, a runaway horse or me” from Starving in the Belly of a Whale.
60 - This horrifying live vocal on The Earth Died Screaming in Florence in 1999
61 - The song he wrote for his future wife, collaborator, muse and inspiration, Kathleen Brennan, Jersey Girl and all it’s unexpected sha-la-la’s, and when he said the following about her in thanks during his Rock and Roll Hall of Fame induction speech: “my wife and her incandescent light, that has guided me and kept me alive and breathing, and sparkling, since we met. I love you Kathleen”.
62 - The whole of the The Heart of Saturday Night record, not least of all New Coat of Paint, San Diego Serenade, Shiver Me Timbers, Diamonds on My Windshield, (Looking For) The Heart of Saturday Night and Please Call Me, Baby.
63 - Waits’ 1988 concert film Big Time, which reviewers said was “more an indulgence than a concert” and that “turns Mr. Waits's performance into a freak show". And they say that like it’s a bad thing.
64 - His appearances on and contributions to Bob Dylan’s Theme Time Radio Hour.
65 - The entirety of his 1986 show at the Tenco festival in Sanremo, Italy on November 22nd.
66 - His leading role, alongside Roberto Benigni and John Lurie in Jim Jarmusch’s 1986 cult-classic Down by Law.
67 - All the instrumentals across his career, demonstrating his genius with music as well as words.
68 - Making a rare appearance at The Troubadour club in March 2022 to sing Rains on Me as a tribute to old friend Chuck E Weiss
69 - The lyric “don’t you know there ain’t no Devil, there’s just God when he’s drunk?”
70 - And this blistering version of Heartattack and Vine from 1980
71 - And the 1997 update on the lyric in Little Drop of Poison, “Did the devil make the world while God was sleeping?”.
72 - When he said that “the world is a hellish place, and bad writing is destroying the quality of our suffering”.
73 - When he said “I worry about a lot of things, but I don't worry about achievement. I worry primarily about whether there are nightclubs in heaven”.
74 - The fact that he is finally rumoured to be working on new music.
75 - The lyrics in, music video for and sentiment of his 1992 song I Don’t Wanna Grow Up.
Happy birthday, Mr Waits.
If this wasn’t enough Tom Waits for you, you can check out Ray Padgett’s excellent Every Tom Waits Song here to read more about, well, every Tom Waits song.
I was hoping PEHDTSCKJMBA would make an appearance! This is so good.
76 - When he brought his shovel into Conan
77 - When his tour t shirts were just photos he took of oil stains in parking lots
Wonderful. I’d add the time Bob Seger, who’d initially lost “Downtown Train” to Rod Stewart, and had covered both “Blind Love” and “New Coat of Paint” on his Fire Inside album, was looking to record another Waits song for It’s A Mystery (1996).
Bob saw Tom walking down the street in LA, pulled over, picked him up, and asked him what he suggested. “How ‘bout ‘16 shells?’ Tom sang him a verse. Perfect. “Where you headed?” Bob asked. “Just take me back to where you picked me up so I can pick up where I left off.”